Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
