i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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