We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
