The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
