North Korea, Best Korea!
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
