there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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