Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Randomize
