he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
