So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize