I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize