I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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