who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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