my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
