the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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