the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
