ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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