its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
