im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize