Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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