I think im going to throw up on grandma
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
