But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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