For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
