You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
