I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
