And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
