I CAN MOONWALK!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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