if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
