I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
