Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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