did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
