we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
