i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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