No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I look better un-naked...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
