If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize