never play flip cup with pint glasses
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
