And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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