Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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