i think my tv is drunk
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
