The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
the night ended with taco bell and tears
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
