i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
