there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Randomize
