spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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