You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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