Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
