Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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