the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
