Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
