He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
