just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
