You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
